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Paris Hilton to design paper towels

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Exclusive: Paris Hilton has decided to go domestic. The heiress--whose iconic fashion creations like copper metallic short-shorts sell at Kitson--has signed a reported multi-million dollar deal with Bounty to reinvent a household staple as a must-have statement. She will design a line of super-absorbent paper towels. ‘I feel sorry for all those women who have to clean up gross spills in the first place,’ said Hilton. ‘Paper towels need some pizazz.’ A Bounty spokesperson would not comment on exactly how much the Hilton heiress will make for creating a ‘clean up collection.’ Charmin is supposedly in talks with Lindsay Lohan about designing a line of tissues; Tampax is said to be circling Jessica Alba.

Okay, bogus. But it’s really not all that far fetched, when you consider the ever growing roster of celebrity designers. Lindsay Lohan is now designing leggings, for pete’s sake. The Rage would like to call out commenter ‘seen it all,’ who had this to say about the recent spate of star seamstresses: ‘Fashion is a joke when someone who can’t sketch and can’t sew can now be a ‘designer.’ Hey, I can stand around and tell someone to add a bow to a plain shirt--does that make me a designer?’ Well put.

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