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Lindsay Lohan: You're no Marilyn Monroe

Lohan9Aleqm5hzzhbpr9y0f9hf1qrm1dgfgbg1ow Why do starlets insist on channeling Marilyn Monroe? At some point, every actress decides to have her "Marilyn moment" and dons a platinum wig and a fake mole to prove that  she's capable of playing an American icon. This week, Lindsay Lohan graces New York magazine in a spread shot by Bert Stern. Yes, that would be the same Stern who shot Monroe six weeks before she died of a reported overdose in 1962.

In the story, Lohan says of Monroe and Heath Ledger's tragic outcome:  "I sure as hell wouldn't let it happen to me." Then, why are you bouncing in and out of rehab and re-creating a photo shoot Drewthat precisely mimics a suicidal woman's lastMischabartonasmarilynmonroe flirtation with fame? And Stern should be ashamed of himself for aping such a memorable photo shoot for a 21-year-old actress whose most notable credit is "Herbie Fully Loaded." Monroe -- who starred in fantastic movies like "The Misfits" and "Some Like It Hot" -- died of acute barbiturate poisoning at age 36.

Lohan joins the ranks of Monroe-philes like Mischa Barton (right), Scarlett Johansson and Drew Barrymore (above, on George cover.) It may be flattering to the icon, but The Rage finds it rather sad that so many young actresses crib Monroe instead of inventing their own unique images.  If you're devoid of charisma and innate sexual appeal, maybe it's time to try beekeeping.

Photos credits: New York magazine; French Vogue; Bert Stern collection

 
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Silicone and vapid post modern mediocrity. Stern sold out Marilyn's hourglass legacy for an tube torsoed airhead. Lohan has no aureoles either. Gag.

Well this is quite pathetic. Those wigs are just so trashy. Even I might look better than Lindsay. Monroe did actually have beauty, but she was was weak and ended up just being a loser. If Lindsay wanted to be a star, she would stand on her own merits, if she has any. Why do women try to emulate past movie stars? You will never be like them, you can't be them, only they are themselves, and only you can be yourself. Only losers try to be something that they are not, and in the process forsake themselves.

Hollywood is full of nothing but pathetic copycats. Sequel this, Part Deux that, there's barely any creativity left in that fake town. Take away all the ridiculous money, and the safe bets will go away, possibly leaving the true artists a little space to grow.

THESE YOUNG STARLETS WILL DO FOOLISH THINGS TO GET THEIR 15 MINUTES OF FAME. LINDSAY DOESN'T KNOW WHO SHE IS. NEITHER DO PARIS, OR THAT INSECURE TRAINWRECK BRITNEY.

THERE'S ONLY ONE MARILYN.

The most hilarious part of this whole thing is people bashing Lohan saying it's disgraceful that she is posing as Marilyn Monroe.

But what people fail to see is that Marilyn Monroe was just the Paris Hilton, Lindsay Lohan and Britney Spears of the '50s & '60s. lol

Lindsay Lohan = fake blonde attention whore that does drugs, sleep around and suck as an actress.

Marilyn Monroe = fake blonde attention whore that does drugs, sleep around and suck as an actress.

Yeah.... Monroe was so much better.

If she was around today, she would be in the tabloids everyday just like Lohan and the other Hollywood attention whores.

Lindsay was cute in Mean Girls but thats about the most enthusiasm I can muster for her. (Sorry, I was unable to catch Herbie-Fully Loaded). Marilyn Monroe was, well, Marilyn Monroe. Ive seen Lindsay in Vegas and Britney in Malibu. They are both moderately hot but niether of them stops the clock as Marilyn did when she entered a room. The primary difference in my mind is that Marilyn did drugs and booze to escape her fame. Lindsay, Britney, Paris, et al, use to create it.

Please. The actresses don't hire a photographer to take Marilyn pictures and then shop them to the magazines.. if you need to criticize anyone, make it the magazine editor's cliched choices. It seems to me this article itself is just an excuse to use the pictures- and further dig up some old ones too!

To Mad Dog's final thoughts on the subject,
Touché & well done.

Hey let poor Marilyn rest in peace will you!Lindsey Lohan has as much right to emulate Marilyn as any actress or drag queen.These young stars need to have their own persona, yes indeed.

I have no problem looking at a naked Lindsay Lohan, because I enjoy looking at any reasonably attractive naked woman. That said, however, Lindsay Lohan is no Marilyn Monroe, not even close.

Awwww.... I feel bad for this girl. I think that it's sad that via her behaviour, she's aligned herself with the Hollywood 'celeb-deb' crowd. In my opinion she does have actual talent - and showcasing THAT is where she should be focusing her efforts. Considering that she has been in the media for everything BUT her talent lately, it was an ill conceived and ill advised choice for her to make at this juncture.

Does anyone remember how lohan became a "celebrity"? Wow, for her to even try to come close to Monroe is a disgrace to true stars. Hollyfake is overpaid and overshot, I am done with these so called celebrities. Lohan is next to Holly from that MTV show. Don't you worry they have wasted our time long enough and soon will be forgotten.

Lohan always looks aged, not healthy...Whereas, although we gasped as Marilyn teetered on the edge, it seems like she never crossed over, even at her death. Hence her status as legendary; A dazziling high-wire act, in contrast to Britney's sit down strikes & freaky outburst. These copy-cat photo's are an insult to Monroe's legacy, in my opinion.

As another poster noted, it's NY Magazine who came up with the idea for this shoot and it's the editor we should be unhappy with.

Why are so many media types in Hollywood and NY, so devoid of fresh and exciting ideas?

NY Mag, Bert Stern, Lindsay Lohan and even the late Marilyn Monroe, have all been ill served by this.

More and more, I'm opting out of mainstream culture and looking for alternatives. A lot of others are too. I'd rather watch a silly, yet original video on YouTube, than almost any Hollywood movie.

I'm not sure what the intended effect was, but I laughed out loud when I saw the photos of Ms. Lohan. I don't think she needs to be ashamed, but I think that over time she'll be embarrassed by these lamentable, brainless photos.

Marilyn may have been an attention seeker, but she sparkled and was original. We all loved her because she had a soft sweetness in her sex appeal that outshined everyone in her present, past, and future. Lindsay is untalented, trashy, and the most classless celebrity I can recall in many years. She may be comparable to Marilyn by some standards, but in my eyes she is on her last lap. Her photos lack any star quality, and frankly, I think she looks like shit. Marilyn still manages to take everyone's breath away. Let someone with oomph - Cate Blanchett or Diane Kruger or even Gemma Ward, give a go at paying homage to a classic. Lindsay Lohan ruins her memory.

Mary asked::" Why are so many media types in Hollywood and NY, so devoid of fresh and exciting ideas?"

In my opinion, the answer is: They are NOT devoid of new fresh and exciting ideas...Since they have money. power & position, why take the risk? To them people are livestock - to be fattened with the cheapest feed. [e.g. Look at how the WGA strike was fought.]

Obama's motto is: CHANGE WE CAN BELIVE IN because any REAL revolution would be crushed. Why is this relevant? Because Obama's campaighn is also crafted by HOLLYWOOD - nothing of substance. Once elected his only true priority will be re-elction in 2012... It's the same hold-the-high-ground agenda as the play-it-safe media types. Whereas, the goof-balls on YouTube got nothing to lose.


Personally I would rather see a real beautiful woman like Monica Corcoran with nothing on than airbrush Lindsay Lohan. I bet a lot of others would agree, but we never get the chance to see quality over merchandise. Too bad...

Monica. Your introductory sentence is incorrect. It should be "Why do." instead of "What do."

I think it was nice that Lindsay wanted to pay tribute to Marilyn but there is only ONE Marilyn. There have been imitators from the beginning of Monroe's career - Mamie Van Doren, Jayne Mansfield, Stella Stevens, etc and they still continue. Marilyn had something that no one can re-create - a softness, a vulnerability, a sweetness that cannot be contrived. It was natural and that is what made her so endearing when she was alive and what continues to make her so endearing today. The twenty-somethings cannot compete with Marilyn. They have neither the curvy perfect figure and beautiful face nor the inner beauty. Love you Marilyn!!!!!!!!!!

Yeesh. What a bunch of silly nannies. I don't understand all the complaints. Lindsay Lohan is a beautiful woman. We all know she is not Marilyn Monroe. Then again, she never claimed/claims that she is. Appearing in a photo shoot in poses similar to M.M. is not a bad thing for Lohan to do. Some of you fellas need to, like, step away from the keyboard...

obviously, Maxime has never seen a Marilyn Monroe movie.

Educate yourself--and learn how to write proper English.

I think this was done rather tastefully. This is a tribute piece. Tributing is rare in Hollywood, an overlooked artform. The last Hollywood tribute I can think of is the shot-by-shot remake of "Psycho".
There is a difference between reviving a piece to pay tribute to the original and remaking a piece thinking you can do better than the original.
As far as Lindsey goes, good for her to choose to expose her body in a true art form rather than in some porn rag or some lousy teen movie. She is a very beautiful girl and a talented actress. I hope she realizes her full potential and takes more complex roles that challenge her.

Memo to LL:

Your movie career is five minutes away from over.

Seriously - it's pilot season. Find yourself a sitcom fast.

At about ten years Marilyn's junior Lohan looks way more fried and depleted than the older, more depressed Monroe. And my God, the wig is horrific. I love Mr. Stern's work, but this is just embarrassing, and an absurd caricature of an important and beautiful historical photo shoot. The original shots strongly evoke sad beauty and impending tragedy. This shoot evokes ridicule and nausea.

I've seen the photos in question and she really does look like Marilyn Monroe in a few of them. She is an individual though, with her own look, and it ain't so bad either.
You people rag her all you want to,...at least she's working, doing movies, and you're on your ass ragging somebody you don't even know like you understand her. What a joke!
She'll gain experience and someday be a good actress or maybe not,.....but you'll still be on your asses ragging,.....

Well, at the least Monroe had a shape to her body, (i.e. hips). Lohan looks like a spent piece of jet-trash. This is a sad expose' that looks to be disturbing -think Norma Desmond as Marilyn Monroe. Lohan looks 10 year Marilyn’s senior in this photo shoot, the B&W enhancement did nothing but show her excelled premature aging process. Is there anything original in Hollywood anymore? Remake this, remake that, it seems as if Tinseltown is stuck in the amber of the past like a dinosaur...at least the dinosaurs knew when to call it quits.

I find it amusing that no one has pointed out that, in today's appearance-obsessed market, Monroe would probably never have been given a chance at movies, because, at size 12, she would have been considered "too fat" to play leading roles by today's standards - yet, despite these superficial standards, she continues to be upheld as an icon of feminine beauty. By contrast, the trendily thin Lohan can only provide a pathetic parody of Monroe in these photos. Ugh.

Monroe was just as scandalous as Spears, Hilton, Lohan...it was just a different era -(little more tasteful one.) It's funny I really can't figure out the point of this article...really. These girls do it for (attention + money) duh. No different than the people writing/ talking publicly about it trying to get them selves attention too. LOL But seriously, if this Monica woman doesn't understand why- maybe she should be writing about bee keeping.

Listen up: The Los Angeles Times is really THE LAST source of information which should mock Lindsay Lohan.
This 'leading paper' was presenting the world a washed up wannabe singer from Canada (Sherrie Leir Laid--I call her Sherry Late), who was at the time 43, had Botox all over her face and made a book deal with a crazy wannabe 'Professor' (Finkelstein) That woman was introduced to us as "Marilyn Monroe Reincarnation" by staff writer Robert W. Welkos, who has really proven that he should forever talk about the LA traffic situation instead Marilyn Monroe!

I think Lindsay is by far a way better 'Marilyn' than just two weeks ago Nicole Kidman tried herself as Hollywood's leading legend (besides being the most beautiful).

So what do you want, LA Times? Don't print every crap on Marilyn, please. You screwed up big time when you gave this broke down John Miner a stage and were jumping at the 'Marilyn was murdered' nonsense. We have seen stars dying the Marilyn way - very recently.
Remember Anna Nicole Smith and do you not remember Heath Ledger?
What is it, people? Read an obituary of Lindsay Lohan, next?
She is trying and she is cute.
She is no Marilyn, but simply because there can only be one Marilyn.
Period.
I am sure that the LA Times has prepared already an obituary of Britney, and of Lindsay, too.
Sick.

Imagine if every new, young male actor did a photo shoot in which he imitated James Dean. The first two might get away with it, but I'd think from that point on, the guys would start getting a little embarrassed and request something else.

big damn deal...Mafia Meat Monroe, Freckles Lohan, Slippery Spears, Pimples Simple-son, HiltonHo, they're ALL merchandise to agents and producers and other non-creative richies....REAL entertainment now belongs to the people via the youtube revolution, and it scares them shitless! They just might see the writing on the wall that there are more talented people are out there who are real people! Posing nude is all this bunch of jizzbags have left. And I think that's great.

Bert Stern Shame On YOU!

This is sick, because that old geezer Stern is screwing up his own legacy and Marilyn's too.
When Marilyn crossed out several images which she did not want to be PUBLISHED, he would use those canceled images and publish them in his book.
He is that greedy and stupid.
What you are witnessing is not the stupidity of a young Hollywood actress (Lindsay Lohan) who is doing a good job as Marilyn, but rather more a self debunking of a photographer who has been cashing in on Marilyn ever since he took her pictures.
He's been touring with her images around the world for many years, and he is selling those images for outrageous amounts.
Those buyers must feel really angry.
Bert Stern, is he getting senile after all?

Come on people!!! Seriously, watch any old movie with Marilyn in it. She was not a "good" actress, she was just easy on the eyes. She isn't even really that "hot" by todays standards. She was popular because she was pretty/sexy COMPARED to just the few other actresses there were. Now her estate makes sure she stays popular. She did drugs, slept around..just like the girls today who are copying her but they have MUCH MORE competition, there are hundreds of beautiful women on the screen now.. There are other GORGEOUS actesses that didn't have the amount of fame as marylin because they didn't have as much DRAMA (sleeping with presidents, baseball stars etc.) in their lives... example Jayne Mansfield.. just remember in Hollywood, any publicity is good publicity, nuff said.

Monroe might have been a size 12 at one time but that's because she understood the day and age she lived in. Before she died she had become svelte and thin because she saw the demise of the very decade she defined. Monroe saw the impending Twiggy days and was changing her look accordingly. In her second to the last shoot her breasts and hips were noticabley downplayed and she was dressed in low riding pants. She had moved from white and beige to the bright patterns and colors of Pucci. The woman was ahead of her time in every way. She saw the sixties coming before they even arrived.

Having said that, If Monroe was trying to make it in Hollywood today, she wouldn't be any size 12.

p.s.

As far as models and actresses emulating Monroe, it's not that uncommon for famous women to pose as sex symbols in history. Monroe did it. She posed imitating several famous women including Jean Harlow, Cleopatra, Mata Hari and the Gibson Girl.

Lighten up on Lohan. She might be an idiot but she has talent and is evidently provokative enough to have people lighting up this board. I think she has a pretty good take on Monroe actually. If Bert Stern himself considered her up the task then maybe all you cats should pull in your claws.

The point is: Why remake someone else's pictures that were good becuase of the essence captured by Marilyn, the natural sexuality that came so easy to her?

Who needed this pictures more: Lohan or Stern. Either way someone should let them know they are terrible looking.

They look forced and trashy. Just another reason to get Lindsay Lohan talked about.... again. (no car and drugs involved this time)

See the whole photshoot here:

http://media.nymag.com/fashion/08/lindsay-as-marilyn/

It features her natty tatties and, through a veil, her nip-nips.

You know Monica, I love your blog but the more I read this post on Lohan the madder I get. Lindsey Lohan's biggest problem is her poor judgment but that can be chalked up to her age. She's an immensely talented young woman who should be poised to be accepting an Oscar by now instead of doing a second round in rehab. Like the rest of us, she will want to get in a time machine and beat the hell out of her 20 year old self one day. Lohan may havee starred in Herbie fully loaded but Marilyn sure as hell made her fair share of turkeys.

I say If the girl has the balls to do Monroe in front of Bert Stern himself then good for her.

As a voice for this paper, Monica might also remember that Lohan is a product of papers just like the Times. In Monroe's day the girl could boff the president and get away with it. Bobby Kennedy came to her house. Can you imange what that would be like nowadays?

But these days even "legitimate" papers like the LA Times are as much a part of the hyena pack hounding these people as any low life gossip rag.

As far as Monroe's stellar acting career . . . girl, paleese. Monroe's talent lay in her still work. She was so annoying on screen I personally can't watch her for any length of time. When she died she hadn't had a hit in three years.

So quit it with the sacred cow Marilyn worship. It's even worse for Elvis for god's sake. Marilyn is the gold standard and no one will ever, ever top her. So let them die trying

natty tatties? nip-nips?

Grow up...

As I sit here, listening to Lou Reed, I am reminded of a generation of musicians, actors, models, and socialites who didn't fuck around. Lou Reed is still kicking after years of rampant substance abuse and is still reliable, producing some fairly respectable and enthralling work.

In her abbreviated 36 years, Marilyn Monroe created an identity, a body of work, and a reputation - none of which were constant, all of which she committed to wholeheartedly, and ultimately to her demise. And although she cannot continue to reinvent herself, as other ageless transcendents have done (Bowie, Twiggy, Madonna, et al) few have reached the iconic status of Marilyn Monroe.

Perhaps the status she has achieved is due in part by the fact that her prolific life was cut so short, as other young icons like James Dean, Jimi Hendrix, Kurt Cobain, the rest of the 27-cursers, or perhaps it is because she lived so unabashedly, offering little or no apologies for her behavior which would never have been scrutinized by the public had she been allowed more privacy.

Regardless of all this, the woman lived up to her fame, delivered a bevy of immortal images from her films to her print work, and will forever be publicly beloved.

What I want to know is how Lindsay Lohan fits in all of this.

According to Fortini, "he was interested in Lohan because he suspected “she had a lot more depth to her” than one might assume from “those teenage movies.” Indeed, many in the film industry believe that Lohan has yet to pursue projects equal to her gifts. Without putting too fine a point on it, you might say Lohan has, like Monroe, a knack for courting the tabloids and tripping up her career...Stern said the project also grew out of his interest in “controversial women,” or “bad girls,” like “Britney, Paris, and Lindsay.” Monroe was, in a sense, the original tabloid queen."

The images of Lohan look hollow, contrived, and boring. They lack the urgency and intensity of Monroe, and I believe it's blasphemy of sorts for Stern to even propose this project.

no thank you.

Kat:
What I love about you is that you are always mad. Your take on Monroe's prescience about the shifting fashion and anatomical zeitgeist of the 60s is great. Bob Dylan, too, Svengali-ed himself and his image. I don't think these actresses today bother to "think" about who they want to become. Cary Grant said: "I pretended to be somebody I wanted to be and I finally became that person. Or he became me. Or we met at some point.” Forethoughtful or fraudulent?
Monica

Nicole Kidman paid homage to Marilyn Monroe in Harper's Bazaar Australia and she did it with aplomb, she didn't even look like she had to try hard to get her and yet there was Marilyn, they have different body shapes and yet in some light, you can easily see Marilyn Monron in that homage while at the same time retaining her own starry status of being Nicole Kidman. Lindsay Lohan being naked, slanting her eyes and doing whatever she is doing with her lips is utterly ridiculous and doesn't even come close. She looks so old and very unpretty, what is up with her skin, exactly? too much tanning? The pictures are not nice at all. She has failed to capture the fun and ease of Marilyn Monroe. It doesn't even look like she was enjoying herself at all. A blonde wig doesn't make you Marilyn Monroe, sweetheart!

I know MM, and Ms. LL you are no MM.

p.s. What happened to your skin, Ms. LL? Why are there so many dots on your skin? Maybe you are just dirty and a quick shower can wash those off? Or are you really that old?

Monica,

You're right, I am always mad but I didnt' mean to sound mad at you.

The reason I think it's okay to imitate Monroe is because there is no way in hell anyone can ever replace her. So let people dress up and pretend to be her. We're all little girls playing dress up at heart.

But you are right about the utter lack of individuality among the actresses and female figures of the day. They pay stylists $5000 a day instead of using their own imaginations and it shows. They all look a like (I would personally like to start one of those spider webbed torch mobs to go after Jennifer Anniston and her GD $5,000 Japanese hair straightening job)

There are no trend setters, there's no individuality, and most of these chicks are nothing but walking bill boards for whatever designer they are whoring for. No one has a "look" unless you count Amy Winehouse and I'm not a big fan of the digging-the-imaginary-spiders-on-your-arms look.

Fifty years ago they had Jackie, Marilyn, Audrey and my favorite diva, Liberace. Now the closest thing we have to a trend is the last-night's-puke look.

Sigh.


Kat:
I applaud your fiery passion. This blog is called: All The Rage!
Your input is always smart and insightful.
Thanks. Grrr!
Monica

Wow, how ignorant do you have to be not to understand whats "wrong with her skin" and insult her? Those are FRECKLES. Hello. People are so quick to judge they forget their common sense.

One thing though is, Lindsay's notable credit is obviously The Parent Trap, despite it being a remake.

Anyway, add Madonna, Anna Nicole Smith, Christina Aguilera, Jessica Alba, Lisa Marie Presley, Charlize Theron, Gwen Stefani for other notable actresses/stars who have done Marilyn esque photoshoots.

Monica, you're like the only person who understands me!

One more thing on the subject. I think that maybe Michelle Obama has some major "look" potential. I think we should be watching her.

Those pictures were just trashy. Seriously, when compared with Marilyn Monroe, Lindsay just looked like a little girl trying to be older than she is and to copy someone far more famous and successful. The wig was horrendous. Especially when she's lying down and you can actually see where it attaches to her head. And Lindsay's expressions, I thought she looked sick in one of them. Marilyn looked sexy, Lindsay looks trashy.

LOL, If Marilyn Monroe looked like that she wouldn't be Marilyn Monroe and she'd definitely suicide if she had that much freckles in her body. Like oh my god she should learn to be herself and then she rags "why do people talk about me so much? leave me alone" well you make us talk about you, you are basically PATHETIC.

 
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